


Lacuna

by mickeyfics



Category: The Dark Artifices Series - Cassandra Clare, The Wicked Powers Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Anxiety Attacks, Ballet Dancer!kit, Bisexuality, Blood and Gore, Canon Autistic Character, Crying, Demons, Depression, Drug Addiction, Drug Use, Eating Disorders, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Eventual Romance, Everyone Is Gay, Everyone Needs a Hug Honestly, Explicit Language, F/F, F/M, Fingerfucking, Genderfluid Character (OC), If you aren’t here for the straight smut don’t worry it isn’t a huge part, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Jaime Rosales needs a hug, Jaime is trying his best, Jealous Kit Rook, Kit Rook needs a hug, Kit also paints his nails and wears makeup idc, Kit has tattoos, Lilith is Still a Bitch, M/M, Mild Gore, Oral Sex, Original Character Death(s), Original Character(s), Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Panic Attacks, Pansexual Character, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rimming, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Sexy Times, Shameless Smut, Smut, The Seelie Queen is also a bitch but she has good reason, Torture, Trans Character (OC), Ty has a piercing, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Vampires, Warlocks, We stan a healthy relationship with healthy emotional boundaries, Zara is still a bitch, bamf!kit, because i haven’t seen cassandra write one yet, kit is love deprived and ty has much love to give, kit sings too, she also hates simon, this is super angsty sometimes, ty deserves better, ty is a sweetheart, wtf am i missing, yes kit dances, yes you heard me
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-22
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-12 00:21:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29626251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mickeyfics/pseuds/mickeyfics
Summary: Jaime Rosales was not okay. Of course, when you’re a shadowhunter you tend to never be okay, likely in between “panic mode” and “we’re all going to die” more often than not. But now, Jaime wasn’t feeling either of those things. He was flustered and speechless. This boy, no, man, was thought to be dead and here he is, standing in front of Jaime, an easy grin on his gorgeous face and a sword in his hand.“Hey.” The man raised a perfect eyebrow. And Jaime, well, Jaime punched him in the face.OrIt’s been four years since the war. Four years since Jaime last caught a glimpse of the blue eyed Herondale, and two years since he presumably died. But when an old friend turns up, Jaime and the others must decide whether to betray their families and save the world, or leave the cause of their issues to fend for himself.~~~~“So, should we like, kiss or something?”Kit made a kissy face. “Make it worth my while.”“Guys shut up, we’re literally trapped in a cave.”Ty sighed and stared at Kit’s shoulder. Maybe they shouldn’t have followed him.
Relationships: Clary Fray/Jace Herondale, Clary Fray/Jace Wayland, Drusilla Blackthorn & Thais Pedroso, Drusilla Blackthorn/Ash Morgenstern, Drusilla Blackthorn/Jaime Rosales, Helen Blackthorn/Aline Penhallow, Jem Carstairs/Tessa Gray, Julian Blackthorn/Emma Carstairs, Kit Rook/Jaime Rosales, Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Mark Blackthorn/Kieran/Cristina Rosales, Tessa Gray/Will Herondale, Tiberius Blackthorn/Anush Joshi, Tiberius Blackthorn/Jaime Rosales, Tiberius Blackthorn/Kit Herondale, Tiberius Blackthorn/Kit Rook
Comments: 12
Kudos: 26
Collections: The Dark Artifices





	1. Acatalepsy   (n.) the impossibility to truly comprehend anything

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for giving this story a chance! i really hope i don’t disappoint. 
> 
> ⚠️ Please be mindful of the tags, i will have warnings before any triggering/explicit content. Please be aware that there is some descriptive gore in this story, i won’t warn you at the beginning of those paragraphs because it isn’t a big part, but there is some in there. if this triggers you, this story is not for you.  
> please enjoy:)

“And the next time I see your ass ‘round here, you’ll be sorry your mama gave it to you!” 

  
  


Jaime groaned and turned back towards the old hag, _ahem, warlock_ \- and opened his mouth, ready to tell her to shove the so-called “fake coins” up her ass, when he saw a mop of black curls staring directly at him. 

  
  


Ty Blackthorn, in all his glory, stood about ten feet away from where Jaime had just been kicked right out of the old warlock’s shop. His eyebrow was arched and a smirk played on his lips. He wore a long-sleeved black turtleneck, showing off his lightly defined abs and flat stomach, paired with ripped skinny jeans and black platform boots. His headphones cupped his ears and blocked out the ruckus of the market around them. If you stared hard enough, the little stud in his inverted eyebrows was visible. His facial structure appeared carved by God himself, his eyes like silver razors, sharp and dangerous. So yes, he basically looked like every assassin in every movie to exist, but _damn_ he pulled it off well. Jaime wondered what Ty would feel like underneath the clothes…

  
  


The sound of a throat being cleared snapped him back to reality. _Oh_ —Ty was _definitely_ smirking now. Fair enough, Jaime mused, he hadn’t exactly been subtle with the whole checking him out spiel. 

  
  


He tried meeting Ty’s eyes, but the silver eyed man stared at his shoulder instead. Jaime sighed, he knew Ty never saw the point in making eye contact, “Why do people say look at them when they really mean look at their eyes?” and so forth. He had a point, then again, Ty always did. He was logical and smart and cool and— _no, we have a mission to complete._

  
  


Jaime looked up determinately, “I’ll try again.” Ty shook his head, “Let me.” And with that, he strolled up to the shop and knocked. 

  
  


Jaime watched as people and warlocks alike gazed at Ty as he made his way into the shop, a charming but small smile being thrown at the hag was all it took for him to reach his goal. Once upon a time, Jaime would’ve been able to do the same, but things had changed since the war. 

  
  


Instead of coming out of his shell, Jaime appeared to have sunk deeper. Sometimes he’d wake up in a cold sweat, panting as crystalline tears streamed down his face. The nightmares were nasty, he envisioned his poor brother on the field again, face cracked open as blood seeped out. The situation only spun out of hand even more so when that crack turned into a horrific, bloody smile, taunting him with his brother’s pain. 

  
  


The sight of the flesh ripping open and the bones crunching as it morphed into a demon made Jaime want to vomit. The gory face would laugh as he screamed and cried for help. He knew it wasn’t real; Diego was _fine_ , not so perfect looking anymore, but alive. And that’s all that mattered to Jaime, though it was hard to look Diego in the eye without staring at the scar. 

  
  


Jaime couldn’t help but feel like it was all his fault, he should’ve been there to help. He knew that he couldn’t have gotten there if he tried, but that never stopped the punishing thoughts from creeping in and clogging up his mind. Like now, he felt himself tremble as he slid deeper into his conscience, scrambling to catch himself as he slipped off the cliff and into the frigid, deep water below. He gasped, tears springing to his eyes and mixing with the salty sea he was drowning in. It was bad— _Fuck, fuck fuck fuck fuck fu-_

  
  


“Jaime!” A hand wrapped itself around his forearm, he looked up. Ty was standing in front of him, strong eyebrows furrowed and silver eyes burying themselves deep into Jaime’s consciousness. 

  
  


Jaime flailed with his arm, looking for purchase in the bustling shadow market. Ty gently led him over to a pile of crates, headphone cord dangling as he slid them off to help Jaime. He sat the hyperventilating man down on one of the crates and placed Jaime’s hand over his own heart, silently telling him to follow his breaths. 

  
  


_In...out...in...out…_ Jaime felt peace wash over him in waves. The imagery of his brother left his mind as he came back to the world around him. The last shaky breath left him and he gently pulled his hand out of Ty’s grasp, feeling a bit ashamed as he knew Ty preferred little to no physical affection. But the man seemed unbothered this time, his focus mainly on Jaime and the source of this panic attack. 

  
  


Ty sat down across from the now calm man and simply asked “What happened?” 

  
  


Jaime couldn’t help but snort. So like Ty, straight to the point. “I don’t know.” he answered honestly. He truly didn’t, one minute he was irritated with himself for fucking up the mission and the second he was in tears on the dirty market ground. 

  
  


Ty sighed, knowing there was no way to get him to talk. He understood, unnecessary conversation was not Ty’s forte. He preferred to chime in when needed. Though unconvinced, he told Jaime what happened in the shop.

  
  


“I got the necklace.” He held up the thing, it was made of bronze and had an intricately designed pentagram carved into it. “It wasn’t too hard to find, the shop is mainly filled with wooden artifacts so the necklace stood out.” 

  
  


Jaime whistled, “Is that a pentagram?” 

He wasn’t exactly sure why they needed this, he was just assigned a mission with Tiberius and went with it. Arguing with the Clave- not the best idea, though he would be lying if he said he didn’t want to cuss them out every time he saw them. 

“It is,” Ty explained. “As you know, the pentagram is used in many necromantic rituals, but this,” he held up the necklace again. “This thing completely derails the purpose of the pentagram drawn out on the ground. This necklace is all you need to communicate with someone from the dead.” 

  
  


Wow. Jaime could honestly see why this wasn’t safe out here among demons, warlocks, and other creatures. Someone would get too greedy. He told Ty so, and the black haired man nodded grimly before storing the necklace inside one of his many pockets. 

  
  


Ty looked up at him again, albeit a bit unsurely this time, “Are you sure you’re alright?” 

  
  


Jaime smiled at him, and it seemed fake to himself even though he couldn’t see it. 

  
  


“Yes, Ty, I’m alright. We can go now.” 

  
  


Ty, looking unconvinced, nodded and off they went. Back to the LA Institute, back _home_. Jaime smiled at the thought. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


Friendship formed in the most unlikely of places. This much was obvious when Jaime found himself getting to know Tiberius Nero Blackthorn on a Friday night. It was a year after the war, both of them were bored and alone in the Scholomance. Thus how they ended up on the floor, bonding over monopoly. 

  
  


Jaime groaned as he landed in jail _again_ . Ty hadn’t ended up in it _at all_ , and through his frustration it was difficult to tell if Ty was somehow cheating or if he was just strangely lucky. 

  
  


“‘s not fair.” Jaime moaned out. “How the fuck am I supposed to roll a one?” 

  
  


Ty chuckled and considered the thought. “Well, there are two dice, that means there are thirty-six possible combinations you can roll-“ 

  
  


“Okay, _okay,_ just don’t even tell me. I don’t need this right now. It’ll only confuse me.” Jaime wrinkled his nose. Ty was exasperating, yet he found himself drawn to the aura of peace that followed the Blackthorn boy wherever he went. It was calming, a nice break from the chaos that usually occurred within a shadowhunter’s life. 

  
  


Ty let a small smile slip onto his face. “You asked.” 

  
  


Jamie stuck his tongue out, a childish move, but Ty laughed. _Actually laughed_. Jaime’s eyebrows rose, he knew Tiberius didn’t laugh much. In fact, Ty never showed much emotion at all, the stoic face of the sixteen year-old intimidated anyone who looked twice at him. The Hispanic boy couldn’t help but feel a little jealous. It had only been a year since everything occurred. 

  
  


‘Everything’ meaning the war, the same war that kicked the shadowhunters out of Idris and forced them into making a living among regular humans. 

  
  


Jaime found he didn’t mind much, as long as that Zara bitch was gone and the people he loved were with him. Of course, the people he loved were busy finding their lovers and living their lives, whereas Jaime was stuck like a tree rooted to the ground. The only thing he’d been good at was running away, but after the war he made a promise to himself: stop running away, live your life. So far he had been unsuccessful, but looking at the Blackthorn boy across from him, he thought maybe, just maybe, he’d find someone to love. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


Jaime blinked out of his stupor, right, they were still in the middle of the Shadowmarket surrounded by people shooting them dirty looks and distrustful glances. He supposed that was fair, the Clave has caused issues in many people’s lives, possibly more than any evil-doer in their history has. 

  
  


He quickly takes that one back, Zara _really_ was a bitch to deal with. But alas, Jaime and Ty still had to get that necklace back to the Institute, and he was starting to get uncomfortably hungry.

  
  


Just like magic, his stomach growled. Jaime blushed as Ty rose his eyebrows at him, a smile making its way up onto his face. 

  
  


“Are you hungry?” Ty inquired, though he already knew the answer. 

  
  


Jaime looked at the ground and mumbled, “Shut up.” He grasped Ty’s shirt lightly and stared at him as if to ask ‘ _Is this alright?’_ Ty nodded and Jaime Rosales smiled brightly before dragging a now laughing Blackthorn behind him. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


He took a deep breath in. ‘ _Mmm’_ he thought, _‘The smell of fresh from the oven pizza.”_ Aloud Jaime exclaimed, “Mi madre used to make pizza all the time. It might not be a traditional mexican dish but damn does it serve well.” Jaime watched as Ty’s lips quirked up, and knew he was smiling at the fact that Jaime had spoken his native language. Ty had a fascination with languages, well, Ty had a fascination with pretty much everything ( **cough *kit* cough)** but he was especially passionate about dialect. 

  
  


The Rosales boy loved it when he made Ty smile. It made him feel whole again, complete. He knew he shouldn’t base self worth off of what other people thought, but Ty never made him feel like that’s what was going on. Ty was to the point, no joking around, so when he laughed at something Jaime said, the boy knew it was genuine, and that made him feel happier than anyone. 

  
  


His smile started to fade though as he remembered that Ty still didn’t really _know_ him, no one did. Not even Cristina, whom he loved as a sister and would stop at nothing to protect her and his family, even if it meant betraying them in the end. He supposes that’s why Diego had said he was cold, well maybe not exactly _that_ but something close. 

  
  


_“He is my brother, but he is—He was born with something missing, I think, some piece of his heart where compassion lives.”_ Jaime reminisced bitterly: he knew he wasn’t the most affectionate, and maybe he was a little cruel sometimes, but it was all for the greater good. At least, that’s what he told himself. But is it truly the greater good if it hurts everyone you love?

  
  


Maybe that’s why he hangs out with people younger than him, he feels like it’s a second chance—A chance to make things right when he ruined his relationships with others. 

  
  


It was no secret that the close relationship he had with his family and Cristina had been badly disrupted after he left, and he tried his best to fix it, but the damage was done. He was on good terms with them, but when it came to making friends and starting anew, he went with the slightly younger ones. 

  
  


It was easier, understanding the dark secrets of someone and learning to love again, rather than fixing the love that was made to be broken in the end. At first his heart felt shattered, but now he knew it was for the better. He found solace in the Blackthorn sitting across from him, listening to the music on his headphones and blurring out the chaos that they called home around them. 

  
  


Jaime wanted that, the ability to concentrate on one thing and one thing only, forgetting about the other problems and just enjoying the few moments of peace. He yearned for it, but as he met Ty’s eyes before the black-haired boy turned them away, he knew that his peace was finally setting in. Or was it?

  
  


* * *

  
  


Jaime stepped inside and shrugged his coat off. After he and Ty ate, they went on patrol to get some extra practice in. Jaime let out a breath as the laughter of kids giggling echoed throughout the Institute. He looked up and watched as Max, Rafael, and Tavvy came running, little Mina chasing after them with her arms stretched out as if she were trying to catch them. 

  
  


The sight made Jaime smile, he’d never had a younger sibling and quite enjoyed seeing the kids get along. He paused, if Mina was here then Jem and Tessa must be too. He glanced at Ty, looking to see if he was all right. The black haired boy seemed okay, and slipped out of his gear before heading to the kitchen to see their guests, Jaime in tow. 

  
  


Julian stood before the stove, seemingly making pancakes. Jaime noticed that his shirt was splattered with paint and grinned, that guy just 

couldn’t take a break from his art. 

  
  


“Jaime! Ty!” Helen appeared behind them and leaned in for a bear hug. Jaime obliged. Ty, on the other hand lightly shook his head and Helen, understanding, nodded with a bright smile. She turned to Julian. “Have you seen Aline anywhere?”

  
  


“I thought I saw her with the kids,” Julian shrugged. “I think she was trying to keep them out of trouble but I’m not so sure it was successful.” and he cringed as a crash reverberated throughout the Institute, followed by a shout from Aline, “Mina! Get off of the wall!” 

  
  


Helen frowned and shook her head. “I’ll round everyone up for dinner,” she glanced curiously around Julian’s shoulder. “What are you making anyway?” 

He smiled. “Pancakes of course.” Helen frowned once more, Jaime thought if she kept doing that she might get permanent wrinkles. “We had pancakes this morning.” 

  
  


“You can never have too many pancakes!” And there were the kids. The eleven year-old laughed and high-fived Max, who grinned and clapped his hands. Helen seemed to consider this, before leaning down and kissing Tavvy on the forehead. “You are absolutely correct.” 

  
  


“Ew Helen,” Tavvy scrunched up his face. “Don’t kiss me in front of my friends.” 

  
  


Helen rolled her eyes and stood up as Aline walked in. Her sour face turned into a lovely, whipped smile. “Hi sweetie.” and she leaned in where Aline met her in the middle with a sweet touch of their lips. Gagging sounds rang around the room and this time it was Aline’s turn to roll her eyes. She turned to Julian, “As if you and Emma didn’t make out all around the house when you could finally be together.” Julian sniffed and turned back around. 

  
  


Jaime sighed in bliss at the warm mood of the family around him. Even though he knew this was temporary, and he’d have to leave again soon, he could enjoy it while it lasted. The delectable smell of pancakes filled the air and he took a deep breath in before taking a seat at the rather large table. Of course, a big table was needed when you had a big family with a lot of friends. Jaime still had a hard time wrapping his head around all of the relatives that the Blackthorns had. It wasn’t as if he had a small family, he was a Rosales, and he probably had more cousins and relatives than he was aware of, but it wasn’t like he’d ever met them. And honestly, he didn’t plan to. 

Jaime snapped out of his thoughts as soon as he heard a portal open. Ah, Magnus and Alec must have arrived. Jaime went back to surveying the room around him, the hustle of the Blackthorns and their unique bonds with each other made him both awed and jealous. 

  
  


But he was happy still, after all, they were letting him stay at the Institute until he figured out his shit. He couldn’t help but feel a little guilty for all the trouble they went to just to make him feel welcome, but secretly he was content and a little more than grateful. Out of all the people he has met in his lifetime, the Blackthorns may be the best. 

Jaime heard laughter and a female voice speak out. “Magnus, please do not teach my child what sex is. Magnus, no.” Jaime raised his eyebrows at that. “ _It sounds like something Magnus would do though.”_ he mused to himself. Who was the girl though? Jaime figured it out as soon as she stepped through the doorway. _Tessa and Jem_. They were here. He glanced at Ty, who had his headphones on and was fiddling around with the cord. Jaime observed as he purposely avoided any eye contact with the Carstairs, and watched him swallow heavily. 

  
  


Gently placing a reassuring hand beside Ty’s plate, Jaime nodded lightly to tell him he was here if Ty wanted to talk. Ty just gave him a tight lipped smile and continued to flutter his hands and fidget. Jaime sighed and turned back to greet Jem and Tessa. 

  
  


He knew a little bit of what happened with Ki- _ahem_ , the _other_ Herondale. He knew the Carstairs were probably still tense and upset over the situation, especially when Jaime saw the way Tessa glanced at Mina before quickly looking away. It was sad, but there was nothing Jaime could do to comfort the poor couple, he knew how much they loved their children and how horrible it was to outlive the first ones—he couldn’t imagine learning to live without another. Jem and Tessa put on a happy facade, but Jaime could see right through it. After all, he’d spent years mastering it. He pitied them, he really did, but after hearing about what Ty had gone through, he thought maybe the youngest Herondale being presumed dead was a good thing, as horrible as it sounds. Maybe that’s where his heart is missing compassion. The dark haired boy shrugged and turned to the table as the food was laid out, he couldn’t be bothered to worry about such things right now, not with Julian’s famous pancakes in front of him. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


The lights of Los Angeles shined as brightly as the stars on the darkest night of the year. 

_“A city that never sleeps.”_ Jaime thought, exhaling as he sat on the roof of the Institute. It was late, he glanced at the time, 1:43 AM. He exhaled again and watched as his breath fogged up in the cold night around him. He was tired of course, but sleep was out of the question. Each night he was plagued by the nightmares: most of them about Diego, but every once in a while he’d see Julian and Emma as the Nephilim once more, reaching down and plucking him from the ground as he screamed for mercy. Nothing worked, he felt every muscle being ripped apart as their fingers tore through flesh and blood. There was no escape. He watched the cold, empty eyes of Dru Blackthorn as he was slaughtered, forced to endure a pain no human should. It was torture at its finest, not knowing the difference between reality and dreams, not being able to _do_ anything about it. He hated it, hated himself and _them_ . _They_ were the cause of all his suffering, why he was here and why he had to leave. Nothing went his way, ever. 

  
  


Jaime chuckled bitterly as salty tears streamed down the rivets of his cheeks and onto the stone cold surface below. He probably looked insane to anyone watching from afar, but did he care? Why should he, hell, he probably _is_ insane. Anyone with this life would be, but he could never tell anyone that, not about his struggles or issues. He’d be classified as lunatic by the Clave, and although he appreciated Alec and knew the man wouldn’t harm him, there was still a long way to go before the shadowhunter world saw any real change. What a depressing life they lived; fighting for a cause to save a world of ignorant humans, fighting to save the ones who betrayed them. Jaime closed his eyes and breathed in the crisp air. It stung his face, caused his fingers to tingle and his eyes to burn. But he loved it, the numbing cold cleared his mind of any and all thoughts of life. 

Sometimes he chugged a bottle of tequila and let it wash away everything. All those thoughts of anger, frustration, and longing would turn into a mind blowing night of sex and partying. But when he woke up, he was hit full force with troubles. It was like they doubled to make up for the lost time he wasted to get drunk and forget. 

  
  


Other times when he drank, he’d be hit with memories of a happier time, a time when everything was easier; when he wasn’t struggling with his sexuality and health. It was a part of growing up, that’s what everyone told him. But Jaime knew better, growing up was supposed to be something else. Something… not like this. He wasn’t supposed to be fighting for his life every second of the day, made to be strong and ready to die at any moment. 

  
  


He wanted freedom, the kind where all you had to worry about was how much sugar you wanted in your coffee, or how long it would take to arrive somewhere. It was painful, why couldn’t he be _happy?_ Deep down he knew why, it was because he wanted someone to love, and someone to love him. Sure, Cristina and Diego had said it many times, but he wanted something _more_ , someone to hold and kiss and laugh and cry with. Male or female, it didn’t matter, just someone, _anyone_. Jaime’s mind went to a certain Blackthorn boy, yes, he knew it wouldn’t happen, but some small part of him couldn’t help but hope. 

  
  


He glanced at his phone again—2:00 AM. Jaime decided then that he should sleep. He had patrol tomorrow too, and didn’t need a raging Julian cussing him out for not waking up early enough. Grabbing his jacket from where he had tossed it behind him earlier, Jaime stood up and glanced one last time at the bright city. “ _One day_ ,” he vowed, “ _One day I’ll be happy.”_

  
  


And with that, he turned on his heel and made his way down the roof, the shining, large city echoing behind him. 

* * *

  
  


Jaime squinted in the vibrant, colorful lights of the club. The bass thundered through his body as he made his way toward the bar, people around him crowded together as they snorted cocaine and drank their lives away. As he neared the bar, he became more aware of his surroundings. A flash of incisors there, perked up furry ears there—Ever since the Cold Peace ended and the Cohort trapped themselves away, werewolves and vampires could be spotted among humans much more commonly, as well as warlocks and faeries. 

  
  


Jaime understood, after missing out on all of this he’d be wasting his time catching up with everything too. Iphones _were_ pretty cool, and he’s seen more than one warlock attempt to figure the damn thing out. It made for great entertainment, really. Jaime smirked as he glanced around again, a beautiful woman was staring directly at him. The club was packed with beautiful men and women, but this one seductress had caught his attention. The dress was around knee length, not common for a club, but perhaps that was her goal, to stand out. She had long, dark hair and red, red lips. Her green eyes sparkled like emeralds as she smiled, showing off her gleaming white teeth. Ah, a vampire. Her fangs stood out most of all. They were sharp and dangerous, he could tell she wanted him to know. But that just made this all the more fun, his eyes narrowed dangerously as he gulped down a shot of vodka. She tossed her hair over her shoulder and swayed over like a predator hunting its prey.

  
  


“Hey.” She ran a finger down his chest. “You looking for a fun time?”

  
  


Grinning, Jaime murmured, “Only if that fun time is with you.”

  
  


The girl giggled. “Ariella.” she leaned in. “And your name is?” 

  
  


“Jaime.” he replied, turning back to the shot the bartender had laid out in front of him. 

  
  


Ariella let out a shark-like grin and licked her ruby lips. “You smell good.” she purred in his ear. He knew she meant his _blood_ smelled good, but with the alcohol running through his system, he honestly couldn’t care less. He swung around on the stool to face her once more as she ran her hands up and down his chest. Wrapping an arm around her waist, he pulled her in. She gasped and sighed. 

  
  


“I say we get out of here.” she whispered to him.

And Jaime couldn’t wait any longer. He nodded and stood up. Ariella smirked at him and grasped his arm before dragging him over to the exit and out the doors. 

* * *

***Smut warning***

Ariella gasped in pleasure as Jaime pulled her into a deep kiss, the alcohol blurring his mind and causing him to react without awareness. Her razor sharp incisors nipped his lip as their tongues tangled. It was messy, wet, and all kinds of dirty. He loved it. Jaime forgot the shitty world around him for a moment as their teeth clacked together as they made out, the slurping sounds echoing throughout the parking lot. Jaime shoved his tongue further into her mouth, kissing her as hard as he could. Their lips would undoubtedly be bruised. Breathy sighs left Ariella’s lips as she relaxed further into his touch. 

  
  


Groaning into her mouth, he shoved her harder against the car, before moving downwards toward her breasts. He suckled on her neck and watched as the spot turned into a blushing pink, looking remarkable on her pale skin. 

  
  


She bit her lip and watched as his hands wandered over her body, before moving upwards and pulling her in once more. She sloppily kissed him, mewling at the taste of his blood as she bit harder on his lip. He growled and sucked on her tongue, trading spit in the nastiest way. Finally peeling himself off of her, he opened the car door and shoved them both inside. 

  
  


Jaime situated himself against the window and Ariella crawled onto his lap. 

  
  


“What if someone sees?” she rasped out as Jaime kissed down her throat. 

  
  


“They won’t once the car fogs up.” he groaned and grabbed her shirt before looking in her eyes to see if it was alright. She nodded and helped him slide out of his own shirt as well. 

  
  


Ariella ran her hands down the rivets of his abs as his roamed over her curves. He grabbed her breast and squeezed. She keened and grasped his shoulders. Jaime reached behind her and unclasped her bra; letting the soft mounds spill out and into his hands. He laughed gently and rolled her nipples around with his thumbs. She panted and dropped her head back, exposing her long, pale neck to his viewing pleasure. His tongue licked up the column of her neck before making its way down to her right breast. He placed little love bites around the areola before suckling it into his mouth. She cried out, grabbing onto his hair and pulling him closer. He bit down and she almost screamed. Pulling away, Jaime leaned over to give the other breast the same treatment, watching her nubs turn red and swollen, shining with saliva. 

  
  


She looked down at him, eyes glistening with blood lust. Ariella pushed him down against the seat before dragging her nails up his torso and chest. He gasped and let out a deep groan, heat shooting straight to his groin. She rolled her hips against his, once, twice, three times, before arching into him to kiss him once more. Their breaths mixed as her hand made its way down to his belt buckle. 

  
  


She chuckled into his mouth and clicked it open. He felt her slip her hand inside and _oh—_ he moaned. Her hands were cool, causing a series of reactions to the temperature difference in his hot body. Ariella’s hand wrapped around his cock, stroking it in time with their panting. He felt her thumb rub his tip, spreading the precum around and making the slide easier. His eyes rolled back into his head and Ariella kissed down his chest, making her way lower and lower. 

  
  


Soon enough, his pants were off and she was stroking him at a faster pace now. She let herself hover over his cock as he stared down into her eyes. He grabbed her hair. “No teeth.” 

  
  


She giggled seductively, “Of course not.” and lowered her hot, wet mouth over his length. He shuddered as she took him deeper. Ariella made her way back up to the head and let her mouth suckle him for a bit before taking him in all the way. She gagged and Jaime moaned as her throat spasmed around him. He curled his fingers through her dark locks and yanked her up before he could cum. 

  
  


She moaned as he quickly slid a hand down her panties, finger sliding into her wet channel with ease. His thumb worked her clit, rotating it in figure eights, making her head spin. She was getting hungrier by the minute, especially as he added another finger. The nasty squelching of her cunt could be heard all throughout the car, as well as her mewls and panting. He pressed his fingers up in a come hither motion and Ariella fell apart. She screamed as she orgasmed around Jaime’s fingers. 

  
  


Jaime pulled them out and sucked them into his own mouth, moaning at the taste. He would’ve gladly gone down on her, but they were both too impatient to wait. She was getting hungry and he was getting more worked up. Ariella gasped as Jaime flipped them, her knees pressing into the back seat and her torso leaning over the console in the middle of the car. She tried to grasp onto _something_ as she felt his cock slide through her folds, but there was nothing she could do. Jaime grabbed his wallet and ripped open a condom packet with his teeth. He glanced down at her slick folds again and rolled the condom onto his length. He teased his cock through her folds just to hear her whine, and then slammed home. She arched into him with a shriek as he moved instantly. 

  
  


Her claws popped out and she dug them into the car seat, whining and dry sobbing as she came apart on his length. 

  
  


Ariella felt amazing, her wetness clinging to his cock with every thrust in and out. He pistoned and swiveled his hips in order to hit her sweet spot. He let himself moan freely too, head lolling back and black spots appearing in his vision.

  
  


“J-J-Jaime—“ she gasped as his tip hit her g-spot roughly. “I need to bite!” She screamed again as her orgasm overtook all at once. Jaime pulled out and tugged her up to meet him. He let his head roll to the side as he slid back in, hoping to finish soon. He watched out of the corner of his eye as her fangs popped out and her eyes turned black with lust. She breathed in the expanse of his neck, licking up the sweat as he continued to pound into her. She rolled her hips down to meet him, and with one last grunt, Jaime spilled into the condom, just as Ariella bit down into his neck. He yelped, it _hurt_ , but the pain felt so _good,_ so distracting. 

  
  


Ariella on the other hand was drowning in the warm liquid. It dripped down her lips and onto her breasts and her hips. She drank with vigor, letting herself enjoy the hot, metallic taste of the deep scarlet sourness. 

  
  


As she drank, Jaime felt himself slipping under and knew he had to stop her. He gasped, shakily bringing his hand up to stop her.

  
  


“A-Ariella- ahh…” he groaned. He was finding it hard to get his tongue under control to say what he needed to. “You need to sto—ahhh-stop. I’m not going to stay awake.” Jaime felt his eyes getting heavier when Ariella finally pulled away and licked her lips. He glanced at her shining lips and leaned in in hopes for a kiss. She obliged and let him ravish her mouth, licking her clean of his own blood, the iron taste filling his taste buds as he reclined back. She smiled at him lightly, a genuine smile, and slid off his lap before gently wiping herself down with a few napkins she had in the console. 

* **end of smut***

  
  


Jaime was out of it. He could see Ariella clean up in his peripheral vision, but his movements were limited. He let out a deep sigh. “Water.” he mumbled. Ariella let out a small laugh and grabbed one of the water bottles in her back seat. She handed it to him and he accepted it with shaking hands. Noticing his difficulty, Ariella frowned and helped him out. Jaime gulped down the water, the cool liquid refreshing his sore throat and clearing his mind a bit. Finally he had enough energy to sit up fully. 

  
  


Jaime glanced at the dark haired woman across from him. He noticed now the splash of freckles across her nose bridge and cheekbones, plus the little scar she had right above her cupid’s bow. She felt his stare on her and looked up. Raising an eyebrow, she asked “What?” 

  
  


He said nothing. Just continued to stare. Jaime gently reached over and brushed a stray piece of hair out of her eyes before saying, “Thank you.” Ariella looked a little lost but smiled nonetheless. 

  
  


“You’re welcome.” she studied him. He had deep brown eyes, like swirling pools of chocolate. His skin was dark and tanned, shining with remnants of sweat. She noticed the tiredness that showed beneath his eyes and the shattered look he wore. It was depressing, she couldn’t help but muse to herself. How these shadowhunters were so bothersome and tough yet so broken inside. 

  
  


This boy needed help, and she would be the one to help him, or at least she’d find someone who would. A certain sarcastic, pain in the ass popped into her brain, but she dismissed the thought. He’d never want to help this shadowhunter, he claimed he hated all of them. She knew it wasn’t true, after all, he _was_ one, but she just chose to stay silent. 

  
  


Ariella sighed and looked at the tired boy across from her again. She would care for him, one way or another. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


Jaime groaned as he woke up. He tried sitting up but the massive pounding in his head and the ringing in his ears stopped him. He laid back against his duvet and squinted at the clock. 12:32 PM. _Damn it_. He was hungover and achy, the bite mark Ariella had left last night hurt like a bitch. He looked at his nightstand and noticed some water with a pinkish looking liquid sitting next to it. Leaning over, Jaime saw a slip of paper sticking out next to the clock. He grabbed it. 

_Jaime,_

_You arrived at the Institute late last night, with some vampire girl dragging you up the steps. She dropped you off and said you had a rough night, though it was fairly obvious by the dozens of hickeys and the bite mark on your neck. I went on patrol with Dru so you could sleep in. And yes, Dru and Thais are here. Please drink the water and the medicine. You should feel better soon. Try to be more careful next time._

_\- Ty_

  
  


Jaime swallowed the knot in his throat, he always felt bad for blowing plans with Ty, even if it was just patrol. Not to mention he missed Dru and Thais, who he wasn’t even expecting to see. 

  
  


Jaime glanced over to the medicine again. Muttering curses under his breath, he grabbed the glass and gulped it down. 

  
  


He spluttered as the strong, sour taste invaded his mouth. Jaime hated medicine, didn’t understand why they couldn’t just use a potion or a spell or some shit, to which Ty had told him, “It will be better to learn more mundane ways in case of an emergency.” Jaime supposed Ty was right, after all, shadowhunters had been living by the old rules for quite some time now, and change was much needed— but this wasn’t an emergency, it was a hangover, therefore he should be able to conjure up a potion and call it good. 

  
  


Pressing his fingers to his temples, Jaime rolled out of the bed, his stomach churning. He stumbled over to the bathroom, the blurry toilet in his sights. 

***mentions of vomit***

Practically lunging himself across the tile, he flung up the toilet seat and threw up. He was pretty sure the gagging sounds he was producing could be heard from Mexico. 

  
  


Jaime finished his little vomiting session and began groping around for the tissue box, head still buried in the toilet for fear more puke would make its way up. Sure enough, about five seconds after that thought, round two occured. 

  
  


He groaned in pain and finally found the tissues. Jaime let the last bit of saliva drip out and pulled the kleenex box closer to him, yanking a couple tissues out and tearing some in the process. He blew his nose and spit into them before dumping them into the toilet and flushing it down with the thick substance he just barfed up. 

  
  


He stood up and closed the toilet lid. Leaning heavily against the counter, he stumbled over to his toothbrush and toothpaste. He practically dumped half the bottle onto the brush before scrubbing like a maniac and spitting. Then he grabbed his mouthwash and gargled until he was practically choking on it. Jaime let it spew out of his mouth and watched it slowly make its way down the sink, the green of the mouthwash and blue of the toothpaste causing a swirling mix of color down the drain.

  
  


Jaime glanced up at himself in the mirror and sighed, he looked like shit. There were dark circles under his eyes, though he was pretty sure those were there before, and hickeys lined his neck. The bite mark looked worse than he imagined, it was red and blue, the puncture marks causing some minor swelling and bruising. He looked at his eyes, brown like mud. Jaime has always hated his eyes— they were the three B’s: brown, boring, and broken. 

  
  


His hair was a bird's nest, tangled and matted. He squinted in the harsh light of the bathroom as he stared a little longer. His cheeks seemed hollow and lips pale. 

  
  


Jaime gnawed at his bottom lip and looked around the bathroom. A pair of white, fluffy towels hanging on a rack caught his eye. Ah, he should shower. 

  
  


Jaime trudged out of the bathroom and took a long look at his room. The bed was shoved in one corner, king-sized (of course) and his dresser lay at the foot of it, pushed against the wall. He walked over to the dresser and began digging for some clothes. After finding a “Don’t talk to me, I’m hungover” shirt and deeming it necessary for his current predicament, he then grabbed a pair of black sweatpants and some black underwear. 

  
  


Jaime turned around and went back to the bathroom, shutting the door heavily behind him. He ran his fingers through his hair and exhaled. He then turned off the bright light and flicked the red LED lights on, putting them to the dimmest setting to cast a calm, relaxing atmosphere throughout the room. He pulled a lavender scented candle out from under the sink and lit it with the lighter he had stored in one of the drawers. Nodding in contentment, he turned to the shower. 

  
  


Throwing the towels unceremoniously on the floor, Jaime stripped out of his clothes. They reeked of vomit, alcohol, and smoke. He threw them towards the laundry basket he had stashed in here, but due to his blurry eyesight, they landed with a plop on the floor next to it. 

  
  


Jaime just shook his head and turned the water on, watching the bathroom slowly fill with steam and jumping from foot to foot on the cold tile. 

  
  


Hopping into the bathtub felt like Heaven. The hot water hit his aching muscles and wiped the grime from his skin. He watched as the water below turned a translucent shade of red, presumably from the bite mark. The water washed away his thoughts, filling his mind with warmth and fogginess. Closing his eyes, he felt the warmth seep into his body, causing goosebumps as he started to warm up. He didn’t even realize how cold he was when he got in. 

  
  


Jaime grabbed the shampoo bottle sitting on the shelf and squeezed a bit into his hand before mushing it through his thick locks. Taking a deep breath in, the smell of apricot overtook his senses and pulled him into a lull of warmth and security. He rinsed the shampoo out and reached for the matching conditioner before applying that and letting it sit as the water ran down his back, soothing his body. 

  
  


Jaime let all of the products make their way out of his hair and then took a hold of the lavender scented body wash, slathering it all over his body. He moaned in pain as he rubbed lightly at the wound on his neck, the sting still fresh. Washing his face with the mint face scrub he had, he turned around and let the scalding water run down his front side. 

  
  


As the water continued to run over him, he began to think. _Why are Dru and Thais here? Why is Ty so confusing? Why can’t I be happier? And what on earth is going on with that Anush guy?_

  
  


Jaime groaned and raked his fingers through his hair in frustration. Everything was so confusing, especially in the life of a shadowhunter. It made him want to scream, to throw things and cry like a child, but he knew he couldn’t. Shadowhunters were supposed to be the epitome of calm, cool, and collected. It was just so _hard_. Trying to face a giant demon in front of you and simultaneously trying to keep track of your friends, all while being expected to stay calm and think rationally. 

  
  


Life is just so goddamn hard sometimes. And maybe he’s tired and sick of all this shit, but somebody should be.

  
  


Jaime abruptly turned off the water with a loud curse as he bumped his bite wound into one of the shelves. Muttering filthy words under his breath, Jaime yanked open the shower door and walked out. He grabbed his towels from the floor and began to dry himself off. The mirror across from him was all fogged up, just a fuzzy mirage of Jaime. 

  
  


His clothes were laying on the counter and he strided over to grab them. 

  
  


Once he had everything on, he reluctantly blew out the candles and turned off the lights. He glanced in the mirror one last time, he looked cleaner, but still as broken as can be. 

* * *

Jaime wiped the sweat off his brow as he stretched his aching muscles. He and Ty had been training for a while now, and Ty had beat him every time.

  
  


The Blackthorn always insisted he hated fighting, he preferred to investigate and study, but for someone who despised it, he sure could kick ass. 

  
  


“Good job.” Ty smiled lightly at him. “You actually held me off for more than five minutes this time.”

  
  


Where most people would say this sarcastically, Jaime knew Ty meant it. 

  
  


“Thanks.” Jaime chuckled. “I think if I had Emma Carstairs teach me like you had, I’d be a lot better.” 

  
  


Jaime had thought about that before, what would his life and training have been like if he had someone like Emma or Julian in it. He would defend his family to his very last breath, but Jaime wasn’t sure they’d do the same for him. Diego had taught him to fight, and to be brave, but he had left before Jaime could learn all of his techniques. 

  
  


“You keep doing this.” 

  
  


Jaime startled. “What?” 

  
  


Ty pursed his lips and repeated himself. “You keep doing that,” he waved his hand. “You act all fine one moment and suddenly you’re completely unresponsive.” 

  
  


Jaime watched as Ty’s hand dropped and fluttered beside him. 

  
  


“I’m sorry. I just…” Jaime trailed off. “I just keep thinking. It’s like my head is going into constant overdrive.” He let out a frustrated groan and dropped himself onto one of the benches. 

  
  


Ty studied him before quietly padding across the floor. “I get it.” he hummed. “My mind is in overdrive whenever something is too loud. That’s why I wear my headphones.” He waved at the cord around his neck as if to say _‘See?’_

  
  


Jaime nodded. Ty was interesting, and he knew what it was like to be stuck in this never ending void. That’s why it was so easy to talk to him, so easy to love him. 

  
  


Ty stared at Jaime. “You know you can talk to me right?” His hands slid nervously into his pockets as he played with the strings in them. 

  
  


Jaime looked Ty directly in the eye, an incredible feat considering the silver eyed boy hated making eye contact. “Of course.” He gently spread his arms, asking for a hug. 

  
  


Ty broke eye contact and licked his dry lips, reaching in to hug Jaime before he lost his confidence. 

  
  


The brown eyed boy let himself fall into the warm embrace, the world falling around him as he forgot everything but Ty in that moment. He closed his eyes, letting himself relax, if only for a few seconds. 

  
  


Jaime pulled back slightly and stared into Ty’s beautiful, steely eyes once more. His breath caught in his throat and he felt goosebumps arise on his arms. They were practically nose to nose. 

  
  


Normally Ty would never allow this, but his face showed nothing but raw pain, losing people, yet never being able to do anything about it. Feeling different, like he didn’t belong; fighting for a chance at normalcy he knew he’d never get. 

  
  


Distantly, Jaime felt hot, salty tears stream down his cheeks. He was broken, and it was time to accept that. His heart pounded in his chest as he buried his face once more in Ty’s shoulder. 

  
  


The man felt Ty shake, and realized he too was crying. And they stood there, letting their tears and anguish fill the room, years of heartache and loss bottled up inside them finally breaking free. 

  
  


The late afternoon sun reflected throughout the room, shining like a spotlight on the two shadowhunters, turning their tears to gold. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well that’s that🧍♀️please don’t hesitate to leave feedback and constructive criticism, i’m always looking for new and better ways to write! 
> 
> so kit is presumed dead 🙈 and jaime seems to like ty a little more than a friend 😉 i really try putting a lot of depth and background into all characters, i hope it’s working!
> 
> Never be afraid to ask questions in the comments either:)


	2. Mysa  {mee • sa} (v)   To engage in an activity that is comfortable and pleasurable, especially at home; being content and cozy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okayyy so this one isn’t beta read and i apologize in advance for that. I might come back later and edit a couple things. sorry for taking so long to update; i’ve had exams and shit this past week and a half😞 please enjoy!
> 
> Trigger warning: ableism

A lone fish swam around the thick layer of algae blanketing the rocks, the sun shining through the crystalline surface of the sea. It looked around as colorful guppies glided through the water, but nothing could match the technicolor scales scattering the fish’s body. 

  
  


The fish slowly creeped up behind a small worm peeking from beneath the pebbles, for if it had a mouth it would say the worm looked delectable. The gentle swish of its tail sent ripples of water behind it, its beautiful scales glinting in the sun. The worm was so close now, the fish could almost taste it. 

  
  


_ Any moment now…  _

  
  


The fish darted quickly out of the way as a hand splashed into the blue water, sending silt all over, turning the beautiful turquoise a muddy brown. 

* * *

  
  


Above water, a man cursed and flailed about, gasping as he groped for a fissure in the rocks to grasp onto. 

  
  


His green eyes were bright, pale skin smeared with dirt and sand as he shivered in the cool water. He was lean, but appeared as if he hadn’t eaten in a while. His hair was a fair blonde, almost as if it had been bleached. 

  
  


Finally latching his hand onto a rather large boulder sticking out of the water, the blonde haired man groaned and hauled himself out of the water and onto the gravelly sand above. 

  
  


He flipped onto his back and panted, squinting his emerald eyes in the harsh sun that glared down at him. Licking his chapped lips, the man sluggishly sat up. 

  
  


_ ‘Where am I?’  _ he wondered to himself, glancing around at the lush greenery and granular sand around him. He blinked.

  
  


This was very different from where he’d come from. For one, it was  _ bright _ . All he could remember is total darkness, and then nothing; not a speck of matter in the void of his mind. 

  
  


He’d been trying to escape it for so long, and now here he was, lying on an abandoned beach, grimy and  _ oh _ ; he was naked. He looked down at himself and sighed again. Rapidly flitting his eyes about, he picked himself up and began making his way towards the jungle, hopefully to find some food. 

  
  


_ ‘And some civilization.’ _ his brain supplied helpfully. Grumbling about his shitty life, Jonathan stepped into the leaves. “Here’s to a new start.” he smiled glumly, closing his eyes and leaving the salty tides behind. 

  
  


* * *

Livvy giggled as a few books dropped over Ty’s head. 

  
  


“Shit.” he turned his eyes towards her, lips pursed in the attempts to hide a smile. But as soon as he made eye contact with her, they both burst into laughter. 

  
  


Ty had been at the Scholomance for a good while now, and he was proud to say that he succeeded in his dreams of becoming a Centurion. And in that time he’d made many great friends, and gained a sweet, amazing boyfriend. He and Anush had decided it was best to keep it down low for a while though, Ty wasn't sure he was ready to confess that not onlydid he like men, but he’d been dating for a couple months now. 

  
  


The silver eyed man knew he’d regret that later, but for now he couldn’t care less. 

  
  


Ty sighed in content as he bent down to pick up the books that had settled all over the textured wooden floor. When he looked back up, he saw Livvy still looking at him, a cheerful smile painting her lips. But every time he looked into her eyes, all he could feel was guilt; for bringing her back and for not listening to Kit. 

  
  


The Blackthorn tensed up and ran his fingers through his hair. He couldn’t think about  _ him _ now, he was happy where he was and enamored by those around him. Ty shook his head to clear his thoughts and stacked up the books before placing them on a nearby shelf for the librarian to put away.

  
  


Ty made his way back to his seat. Stacking his chosen books on the smooth surface of the table, he pulled out a chair and collapsed into it. 

  
  


His notebook sat on the end table in front of him, spread open and tempting. Huffing, Ty leaned over and grabbed it. He flipped through the pages until he reached a particular spot he’d never let anyone see, besides Livvy of course, who he didn’t really have much control over to begin with.

  
  


It was a sketch of a man, his face structured with a sharp jawline, full lips, a perfectly pointed nose, and distinguishable cheekbones. His ears were slightly pointed, as if he were part Faerie but not quite full. Around the man’s neck sat a bronze pendant, exactly like the one Ty had just collected at the Shadowmarket.  _ ‘But they aren’t the same’.  _ Ty thought bitterly. 

  
  


The sketch was incomplete, the man’s eyes light with not quite correct pencil marks Ty had erased. His eyebrows were furrowed, and he looked worried. For what, Ty didn’t know, but he was going to find out.

  
  


The black haired man drew this at 3:00 AM a few nights earlier, right after he had awoken from a restless slumber. This was the man he’d been seeing in his dreams, glimpses of his eyes fading in and out of Ty’s vision. Every time the Blackthorn jolted awake, he’d forget what they looked like. Only in his dreams he saw them, and only in his dreams those distraught eyes stayed. 

  
  


The lines of the sketch were light, for Ty could not remember the details of the man after he gained consciousness. The pendant was bronze, small engravings embedded within it. Ty had always been a curious boy, and by the Angel he wanted to know what they were, and who the man was. He hadn’t told a single soul, minus Livvy, who had become an  _ actual soul _ , about this man or his strange dreams. 

  
  


Most people seemed to think he was cold or odd, he’d even once heard rumors that he was a lunatic (he wasn’t), but Ty tried not to listen. Livvy had always told him, “Ty-Ty, you shouldn’t worry about them.  _ They’re  _ the weird ones.” And so he accepted this answer and moved on with his life. But even if he was different, he still felt the emotions and pain that everyone else experienced, including the insecurity. The tall man just didn’t show it as well. 

  
  


Ty couldn’t let some silly dreams and a necklace that might not even  _ exist _ cause even more gossip. So, he kept it to himself. But as he looks down at the notebook again, he decides that maybe being quiet and introverted is better. 

  
  


His dark curls dropped in front of his hair as he continued to flick through the pages. He turned to the research he’d done on bronze artifacts. There were notes and sketches scattered all over the page, each one reminding him of the one in his dream, yet not quite matching it. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t absolutely exasperated with his inability to remember what happens in his sleep. 

  
  


Ty plucked the bronze pendant he’d found with Jaime from the table and held it up to the sketches, comparing and noting the differences between the objects. 

  
  


The steel eyed man glanced over the notes on the left page, upset at himself for not being able to put the pieces together.

  
  


_ ‘Latin...? _

~~_venila_~~ _Venelia (a name?)’_

  
  


Ty ran an agitated hand down his face and groaned. He left the notebook on the table and stood up to get some water, throat thick with the lingering feeling of disappointment. 

  
  


* * *

Livvy stared as her brother left the room, the sour feeling of not being able to comfort him welling up inside. She turned back to the abandoned paper and drifted over to it, hovering above Ty’s small doodles and scribbles. She smiled wistfully, he truly had grown into a smart, handsome man in the last four years. 

  
  


The ghoul looked down at herself, greeted with the sight of a not quite matured woman. A bitter laugh bubbled out of her throat, if she could cry there would be tears streaming down her cheeks. But no, all she could feel was the stinging sensation of tears that would never fall. She could never fully hate Ty for what he did, but she’d always felt conflicted about that day at the lake. 

  
  


A small part of her resented him for bringing her back. She had finally gotten a new chance, a way to meet new people, albeit  _ dead _ , but people nonetheless, and Ty had yanked that chance out from under her. 

  
  


She supposed she understood. Ty was her twin and they had a bond like no other. But he needed to let her go, and he had to learn to live without her. Even as a ghost Livvy felt as if Ty was finally growing apart and living life, but since she was still connected to him, she’d always hold a part of him back. And the young Blackthorn girl didn’t want to be the person that stops him from reaching his full potential. 

  
  


She had an inkling about who the man in the portrait was, but the ocean eyed girl would never tell. Livvy knew that telling Ty would only break his heart even more. She wanted to tell him, to let him know that even though she loved him she wasn’t happy, and she’s sorry for ever jumping in front of Anabel. 

  
  


Livvy covered her mouth with her hand and let out a dry sob.  _ “I’m so sorry Ty-Ty.”  _

  
  


* * *

Ty had always loved puzzles. The mysteries and questions excited him like nothing else in the world. As a child he’d spend hours staring at the computer, figuring out how it operated. That childlike wonder transitioned into adulthood and he still gets the same giddy feeling whenever a mystery needs to be solved. 

  
  


The man had many reasons for loving them. For starters, they allowed him more time to think and focus on one thing in the world. He often grew overwhelmed with crowds and noises around him, the chaos overstimulated his brain and provoked a distressed reaction out of him. Centering his mind around one thing brought him peace and amity. 

  
  


The second reason he loves puzzles is simple, he likes to learn new things—whether these things were about objects, people, magic, it didn’t matter. Ty would often use his problem solving skills to figure out what neurotypical people were like; the things they felt and the way they interacted with others. The only hands-on experience he’s ever had with romantic love and socializing comes from observing, so he tries his best to fit in by doing what he does best: surveying. 

  
  


Tiberius still wanted to know more, he always did. He’s more advanced than most Shadowhunters because of his yearning for knowledge. Most Shadowhunter see Mundane customs as stupid, but Ty found them positively fascinating. That isn’t to say that most Nephilim are stupid per say, most know of comics, and all know of electronics and fantasy things like the Avengers, but when it comes to possesions such as medical aid and other inventions—airplanes for example, they become ignorant. Ty supposed they didn’t see a point in them because they had portals and  _ iratzes.  _

  
  


But Ty loved the things Mundanes built. The idea that a giant contraption made of metal could  _ fly  _ was just astounding to him, even though he’d spent his entire life around pegasi. Ty still remembers the first day he’d heard about airplanes; they had just gotten back to the LA institute after the war with Jonathan Morgenstern. He remembers sulking upstairs with Livvy, only to find an old computer in one of the spare offices. He and Livvy had wasted the entire day on that thing, figuring out codes and messing around. 

  
  


Ty’s eyes crinkled as he reminisced those days. Since then, Shadowhunters had come far out of their shell when it came to technology and modern day traditions, especially after they were thrown from Idris. Learning to blend in with oblivious humans had been difficult, but they’d pulled through. 

  
  


Unsurprisingly, most  _ still  _ never saw the point of Mundane medical care. Ty knew that it would be so much better if they learned it. If he could continue to climb the ranks of the Scholomance, it’s possible he might be able to convince people to learn modernism.

  
  


Ty wasn’t stupid, far from it actually. He was autistic, neurodivergent if you will. The gray eyed man figured it out a little while after the war, he’d overheard Julian talking to Emma about something Kit had told him, and proceeded to do some research of his own. 

  
  


Sometimes Ty felt insecure or uncomfortable about it, no one really seemed to understand how difficult it is for him to interact like they do. He’d seen videos and articles about people on the autistic spectrum being seen as less than human, and many other people with harmless intentions causing harmful reactions. And it was only ten times worse in the Nephilim community. 

  
  


Anyone who acted remotely strange was classified as crazy and either killed, exiled, or never seen again. Ty shivered as he thought about it. 

  
  


The Nephilim were harsh sometimes, though things have been getting better in the recent years with Alec as consul. The LGBTQ+ community had grown in numbers and the Blackthorn had even seen multiple pride flags hanging about on patrol days. 

  
  


But even with that, nobody truly knew about disorders or diseases or illnesses. Ty truly wanted to help change that, he wanted to bring more awareness to other Shadowhunters like him, too afraid to speak out. So he studied, read, and trained, working hard to reach his goals. If there’s one thing Ty is better at than anyone else, it’s his dedication to meet an objective. 

  
  


* * *

Tiberius Nero Blackthorn gazed across the sparkling water. He’d been standing on the beach for a while now, black jeans rolled up around his strong calves and his white shirt folded up to his elbows. He let his hands drop to his sides and flutter as he inhaled the deep, salty ocean air. 

  
  


It was around 7:00 PM, and the sun would set soon. The sky was a navy blue directly above him, fading into a striking cherry color. The red met an apricot orange, which then cast a blushing hue of pink and purple across the ocean surface. The waves crashed and foamed against the sandy coast, tide rising as darkness crept closer. 

The intense rays of the sun began to fade below the line where the sky and sea meet. Ty sighed as its radiant saffron color ultimately dipped below the surging ocean, where it would spend another nine hours in hiding from the city of Los Angeles. 

  
  


Ty wishes he could do the same as he looks over to the teenagers giggling and shoving each other in the cool water. It’s not that he couldn’t talk to people or join them, he just preferred not to. It took time and energy and the pale man had much better things to do. 

  
  


He shivered and wrapped his sweatshirt tighter around him as a cool breeze swept in from the harbor. It sent chills down his spine and an eerie feeling washed over him. Ty’s hand shot to the dagger tucked beneath his layers of clothes and clutched it tight. He whipped around and scanned his surroundings. The Blackthorn saw the kids wading in the water, the moon and stars coming out and twinkling brightly above. An elderly couple walking down the coast, leaving footprints behind, only for them to disappear as the tide rematerialized. 

  
  


Nothing out of the ordinary jumped out at him, which was a troubling thought because he still felt the awful suspense crawling all over him. Ty slowly slid the dagger back in its sheath and stealthily made his way back towards the Institute. 

  
  


As the dark haired man grew closer, the feeling slipped away. Whatever that was, it clearly decided to stay away as he neared his home. Hesitating once more, Ty swiveled on his heels back to the horizon and peered around once more.

  
  


A sudden rattle caught his attention and his eyes shot to the source of the sound. It came from a dark alley between the buildings, one Ty had oddly never noticed before.

  
  


Fear and anticipation crawled up his spine as he slowly approached the small pathway. The rattling sound increased in volume as he crept nearer and nearer. Whipping out his blade, Ty blocked the entrance to the alleyway with his dagger glinting in the moonlight. His breathing was ragged as he turned in circles. 

  
  


Nothing. Not a _single_ _thing_. The alley was completely barren, not a speck of dirt on the ground, nor any animals to be seen. The trash that you normally see in places like this was nonexistent. Ty’s stormy eyes widened in shock at the empty place. Confusion swarmed him like a million moths overtaking a light. The brick walls looked brand new, the supposed to be dirty ground spotless, cement looking freshly poured. 

  
  


Ty fished out his witchlight and clutched it tightly in his palm. The crystal-like stone lighting up the whole fissure. He was right—this place looked as if it had never been touched. Maybe it was a new alley? 

  
  


_ ‘But why would they build a new alley near an abandoned church?’ _

  
  


Ty couldn’t think of any possible reasons for something like this; unless it was made to be a portal entrance. A lightbulb went off in Ty’s brain. Of course, it was a portal entrance! Possibly a glamour, a very strong one, suggesting a very powerful warlock made it. Maybe Magnus or Tessa. 

  
  


He’d overheard Magnus complaining about not having enough room to open gateways to different places, maybe he’d decided to conjure up a little place to do it. Ty nodded firmly, that  _ had _ to be what it was. Satisfied, he turned around, taking one last glance over his shoulder at the mysterious nook. The Blackthorn shook his head and carried on his way home, certain everything was fine. 

  
  


But why did Ty still have that chilling feeling of disaster waiting to happen?

* * *

  
  


Ty was sitting with Anush in his bedroom at the Scholomance. His boyfriend was leaning against him, back to chest. They were watching Netflix, some show called “Tiny Pretty Things”.  **(I would like to say yes, this is a real show, and it’s amazing)** It was a murder mystery that took place in a ballet school. Ty supposed it was pretty good, it had good representation of LGBTQ+ and diverse characters. He’d never thought much of dance before, but he became fascinated while watching the way the dancers could leap across the stage. 

  
  


“What are you thinking about?” Anush glanced up at him with a small smile etched onto his face. 

  
  


Ty hummed, “Nothing.” 

  
  


Raising an eyebrow, Anush leaned up to peck him on the lips before snuggling back down into the steely eyed man’s chest. “Okay.” 

  
  


Ty appreciated that Anush never pushed him to elaborate when he didn’t feel like talking. Words sometimes refused to form in his mouth and he would much rather use actions to describe his feelings. Anush seemed to understand that and always let the Blackthorn boy do what he needed to feel better. That’s what made him such a great boyfriend. 

  
  


Once upon a time Ty would never even dream of dating Anush. After all, the man had been in agreement with the Cohort for quite some time, only changing his views when he realized their methods were harmful and wrong. Ty still remembers hearing about Anush fleeing from Diana and Gwyn after the Cohort was attacked. Anush had told him that afterwards he was punished because of his cowardice and later ran away to join the resistance. 

  
  


Ty was glad that Anush decided to come back after everything that had happened. Of course, he was forced to go through all of the tests again to prove his worthiness as a Shadowhunter and Scholomance student. In the end he’d made it and him and Ty became good friends. That friendly atmosphere led to a deeper level of attraction and soon they were dating. 

  
  


Tiberius closed his eyes and recollected his first kiss. 

* * *

_ 2015, Friday November 6th, 1:48 AM _

_ Ty heaved as he slammed his door shut behind him. The library curfew had ended hours ago but he had stayed behind to do some more research for their next training exam. He covered his sweaty face with his hands and groaned. Being accepted into the Scholomance was one of his biggest dreams and he knew what he was getting into, but no one told him that also meant sleepless nights filled with words.  _

  
  


_ To be fair, Ty loved words. The way some of them would roll right off the tongue. Words that end with ‘r’—Like Christopher. _

_ No, Ty would not go there, not tonight. He wasted too much time and too many thoughts on a boy who left him, a boy who may not even be alive. Livvy told him to let go, to move on and find new friends. It had been hard, Kit was the only one who’d ever understood him, the only one he’d make eye contact with and touch and—  _

  
  


_ Ty exhaled. He glanced around his organized room, lined with shelves, books piled high. His throwing knives sat on a wooden plate, hung up on his wall. They were etched with faerie designs and had been given as a birthday gift from Kieran, Mark, and Cristina. Although Ty was never much of a fighter, he loved his knives. Long distance weapons were one of his favorite things, the thrill of being hidden and taking down oblivious demons with a simple well-aimed shot made him feel giddy inside.  _

  
  


_ He stepped out of his shoes and placed them neatly by the door. He shrugged off his jacket and hung it on the coat rack. Ty padded over to the bed and flopped down on it in exhaustion. The Scholomance was an incredible place and everything he thought it would be, but they had high expectations for students, even higher than the Shadowhunter academy. Being a centurion meant being one of the elite, the best of the best. Ty wanted to make an impact on Shadowhunter life more than anything. He worked hard to get here and he would work hard to stay.  _

  
  


_ A part of him wondered how the hell Zara had managed to get in here, she was one of the worst Nephilim Ty had ever seen. Through hard work and determination anyone could become a Centurion, anyone  _ except  _ Zara.  _

  
  


_ Their training was very difficult. Although the Scholomance was meant to be a place for academics and intelligence, it was also known for its militia-like ways and combat techniques. Ty had learned how to take someone down with something as simple as a string here. The downside to their strictness was their close-minded ways of thinking—Especially when it came to his headphones.  _

* * *

_ Ty’s training instructor had insisted he take them out one day for hand-to-hand combat. Ty had replied that he needed them to focus, they helped. The instructor had frowned at him and told him again to take them out. When Ty continued to refuse the man grew angry and stormed over before actually  _ ripping _ them from Ty’s head.  _

  
  


_ The Blackthorn watched in despair as the teacher snapped them in half, breaking the expensive headphones. Ty had never been one to get embarrassed easily, but in that moment he felt more humiliated than ever before as the other students whispered to themselves. He shut his eyes tightly and tried to blur out the ringing in his ears. This was something he had faced before, and he was certain he could do it again.  _

  
  


_ But when the instructor called him up to fight, Ty found he couldn’t concentrate on anything. His surroundings closed in on him, the students' eyes watching his every move, the teacher still seething with anger, his broken headphones lying on the ground. The sounds around him crescendoed and screeched in his ears like a broken record.  _

  
  


_ He was starting to panic as he stared at the wall behind the guy he was supposed to be fighting. The booming voice of the instructor sounded far away as it carried over the crashes in his mind, wait, had he told them to go? _

  
  


_ A splatter of blood on the mat there, a punch here. A crack resonating throughout the room as Ty’s skull landed with a sickening crunch on the tile below. His head swam and his eyes blurred. Shouts of alarm and shock encompassed his milieu. Eyelashes fluttered against prominent cheekbones as the bloody man on the floor faded out of consciousness.  _

  
  


_ When the man awoke, it was nightfall. Moonlight flowed in through the open window and lit the room in a silver glow, reflecting the Blackthorn’s eyes. Those same eyes stared around the room blankly, a light breeze ruffling his blood stained hair. Ty knew he was in the infirmary as soon as the acrid smell of bleach hit his nostrils.  _

  
  


_ Coming into his senses, the man softly slipped out of the bed, cringing as he stepped on a loose floorboard. He wandered over to the open window in a daze, mind still hazy with that afternoon’s events.  _

  
  


_ The abundant greenery below the jagged mountain covered the land. The Scholomance had been built into the side of one of the mountains, and Ty would forever be awed by the architectural brilliance. The man leaned out the window and breathed in deep, the crisp night air clearing the fog from his brain. He peered out over the edge at the stone walls below. The place looked incredible in the stars.  _

  
  


_ Ty wondered what the stars thought of when they looked down at Earth. The unfairness and inequality didn’t exist to them. People all looked the same, like little ants, crawling around in desperation for survival.  _

  
  


_ ‘If only that were how it was down here.’ Ty mused to himself.  _

  
  


_ He propped his chin on his hand and sat there for hours, breathing in the scent of pine and ocean. Falling asleep was easy after that, his mind finally calmed after a rough day.  _

  
  


_ When he awoke again, he startled at the sun rising just over the mountain tops. Ty watched in admiration as the sun casted hues of crimson, much like the blood spilled on the mat, across the fading night sky. A sliver of the moon still peaked out, wishing Ty farewell for another twelve hours.  _

  
  


_ The man’s bliss came to an end as he remembered where he was. Ty stood up and stretched, neck and head throbbing. He hissed as the pain finally set it—The nurse must have had him on something earlier.  _

  
  


_ Speaking of the devil, she popped her head in and smiled way too brightly for… Ty glanced at the clock: 5:09 AM. His eyes about popped out of his head, it was much too early. But the nurse seemed to be cheery enough as she strolled over and placed a hand on his head. She hummed to herself as she grabbed some water from the fridge and brought it to Ty.  _

  
  


_ “Drink this, honey. When you finish it, there are pancakes down in the cafeteria.” she looked at him sympathetically. “Please try to be more careful next time!” _

  
  


_ Ty nodded and looked at her earring.  _

  
  


_ “Thank you”, he mumbled.  _

  
  


_ She smiled again. “Anytime.” _

  
  


_ Ty made his way to the cafeteria and halted when he arrived at the doors. He already speculated that there would be rumors, and he had to mentally prepare himself. Gathering up the courage, Ty walked in, trying to appear confident and calm even in his state of distress. And oh boy he regretted it. People immediately stopped their conversations and turned to him. Mocks and whispers filled the air once more. Ty couldn’t take it, he turned on his heel and fled. _

  
  


* * *

_ That was a harsh moment in his life. Ty supposed it helped him grow, he learned that in order to be strong you needed to stand up and defend yourself, no matter how hard. Snapping back to reality, Ty realized he was still on his bed.  _

  
  


_ He pondered going to sleep for a minute, but ultimately decided to go on a walk instead. Ty grabbed his jacket and shoes once more before quietly sliding out of the door and creeping down the hallway. He opened the door to the Scholomance just a crack and squeezed out. He faced the door and shut it quietly before turning around and letting a very manly shriek out. There was a boy about his age standing there, looking like he had been caught with his hand in a cookie jar.  _

  
  


_ The other boy’s eyes widened and he shushed Ty.  _

  
  


_ “Be quiet! They might hear us.” He put a finger to his lips.  _

  
  


_ Ty narrowed his eyes. “Who the hell are you?”  _

  
  


_ The boy grinned and puffed out his chest. “I’m Anush!” he held out a hand. “Pleasure to meet you.”  _

  
  


_ That night, Ty felt something he hadn’t felt in a while, a true beginning of friendship. _

* * *

_ Over time, he and Anush had started feeling romantically inclined towards each other. Or at least Ty assumed that’s what it was. He figured you didn’t just go around wanting to kiss your best friend all the time.  _

  
  


_ It was three months after their friendship that they kissed for the very first time. Ever since Ty saw the view from the Infirmary, he and Anush snuck up there every night to watch the sunset and laugh.  _

  
  


_ Ty had looked at Anush and Anush had looked at Ty. Their smiles had slowly disappeared along with the world around them as they leaned in. Ty felt the years worth of walls and barricades crumble as their lips met. Breaths mingled with each other and hands groped for purchase. The saliva slicked lips met again and again until they could no longer breath.  _

  
  


_ Ty had stared into Anush’s eyes that night, and for once he didn’t regret it.  _

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHEWWW. This chapter is not as long as the last one but my plan is to make the next one about twice as long because it’s you know who’s pov *wink wink* 
> 
> I really actually found that i liked writing about Ty and Anush’s past with each other. I think overall they make a cute couple even if they aren’t canon, kind of like Emma and Cameron. 
> 
> I also like this one because i tried very hard to put Ty’s pov as an autistic person into perspective, and i have to thank @thechangeling (tumblr) for that! They really helped me understand what it’s like facing ableism and hate better. Guys, please try and learn about other cultures and people before you speak about them; it makes everyone happier. Anyway, thank you for reading<3


End file.
